Well, gees-I definitely didn't plan on abandoning this blog for weeks and weeks but it's just one of those things that happen.
I'm sure if you read this blog, you read my other blog and have heard that I had my baby. Actually, I gave birth almost seven weeks ago. Yeah, I am slow like that. Before Asa's arrival I imagined myself calmly blogging as he napped, puttering around doing housework with him in a sling and just being giddy at being a stay at home Mom. Ok, now imagine almost the complete opposite of that scenario and you have my current life status. Although he does indeed make me very happy and we are truly blessed to have Asa in our lives.
I wanted to open back up here with my birth story-well, with Asa's birth story- but I think that even after seven weeks there are still a lot of parts of it that I am processing. Let's just say giving birth was the most shocking and traumatic experience I've been through. That is not to say that it wasn't beautiful and joyous as well. Pretty much any emotion I've ever felt was felt during my 24 hours of labor. I will say that I did birth as planned at the birth center, it was a drug free birth and at the moment we are all ok. Things were a lot different than anticipated and maybe someday I will let that all go. For now though, it stews...
Probably the most difficult part of it all was the first week postpartum. I didn't fully grasp that I'd be caring for this new life while I myself was trying to heal. Perhaps the biggest lesson I've ever learned I learned during that week: if I don't take care of myself, I am pretty useless to everyone else. That's been a hard one for me to grasp, but oh so important. I stepped back, admitted defeat a few times and took the help that was offered. It was the only way to move forward and I'm so glad that I did.
Asa is an amazing soul. I swear he came out of the womb smiling. Though he's a fragile little creature he is astonishingly strong both physically and mentally. I cannot describe how much joy he gives us. People told me that a child would make me love my spouse even more and they were right. We are very lucky, indeed.
So this post is all over the place, I'm not even sure it makes much sense as I am currently functioning on about three hours of sleep. Basically, I just wanted to come back here and say hello. More soon.